therapy and ??

sorry not to be using capitals. just not feeling like bothering today.

this is ellis. it's been pretty much all ellis, all the time, for what feels like forever. i'm pretty sure it's been at least a month now, probably more.

not feeling really equipped to be an adult, either. i'm scared i don't have a choice. i'm scared the adults are never going to come back. maybe i'd wind up growing up, but i don't know. hard to say.

my therapist says that she knows the adults are still in there somewhere. but i think she's going with what she's supposed to say, because she also thinks that when they come back and there's more cooperation, the adults are going to help to provide the structure i need.

right. not so much. they've never done it before.

i'm really angry at them. i mean, what business do they have, leaving me in charge of everything? like i'm supposed to know how to take care of the little kids, or cope with outside life, or anything?

but i also feel guilty, because i'm usually the one who copes, and gets things done, and somehow, i can't figure out how to do it any more.